How to Support a Loved One Who is Pursuing Traditional Publishing
Because traditional publishing can be a long, lonely road.
UPDATE: Now with pursuing spelled correctly. 🤪 I shouldn’t write posts while my 8-year-old describes video games to me.
Writing a book is hard. Querying a book is hard. Being on submission is hard.
If you know someone who is pursuing traditional publishing, don’t be surprised if you ask them about their work and only get a groan in response.
First off, I want to define traditional vs. self-publishing, because there are a lot of differences, though both are legitimate ways of getting your work out there. One big difference, though, is that authors pursuing traditional publishing have very little control over when their book actually comes out. In order to be traditionally published, you typically need to go through the process of finding a literary agent, called querying. Once you get an agent, the agent then pitches your book to publishers of all sizes, in the hope that they make an offer on the book, securing a book deal. Because of this, there are too many unknowns to be sure when — or if — a book might be released. Self-published authors, on the other hand, hold a lot more control. They are either doing the work of editing and designing a cover themselves or hiring someone to do it. It’s easier for them to create a schedule around their book release.
There are pros and cons to both traditional publishing and self-publishing. With self-publishing, you have to front all costs of production yourself, while traditional publishers will take on the costs and usually offer the writer an advance. Self-published writers have total control over their titles and covers, but traditionally published books are more easily distributed in bookstores. I could, and might, write an entire article about this, but for right now, I want to focus on how you can support those in your life who are pursuing traditional publishing (as I am).
Because of all the unknowns in publishing, there will be a period where your loved one has no physical book for sale, so I’m breaking this article down into what you can do before a book exists, and what you can do leading up to and after its release.
Before They’re Published
Pay attention to the process.
So, your loved one wrote a book! What questions should you ask to show you’re interested? The first one might be how they plan to publish. As I already touched on, traditional and self-publishing are very different experiences. Once you know the route they are going to take, dig a little deeper into the process. You’ll find pretty quickly that the odds of getting an agent and then selling a book are low, and that publishing is an intensely slow process. It’s realistic for it to take years for a completed manuscript to be made into an actual book. Having an understanding of what they are going through will help you not only ask the right questions, but also tailor your support to what they need.
Encourage realistic positivity and celebrate the little wins.
Publishing can be a real mind bender because the odds of being traditionally published are low. BUT, a writer needs to keep a positive attitude while pursuing traditional publishing so that they don’t roll up into the fetal position and give up all their dreams. It’s called balance. You can help them through it by offering realistic positivity (“I think your book has a really strong plot, and I can see why an agent would want to read it!”) and celebrating all of the tiny wins that happen during each step of the process. These little wins might be:
Finishing a draft
Incorporating edits
Getting a full or partial request from an agent
Having an agent or publisher ask to set up a call
Really great feedback
Landing an agent
Going on submission
Getting an offer
Signing the contract for a book deal
When it comes to publishing, ALL of these milestones are huge. Make sure that your loved one is properly celebrating their wins to help with the devastating blows of their losses (and EVERY writer will experience losses).
Listen to them vent.
Like I said, this experience is hard. And sometimes the best thing you can do is be a shoulder to cry on when it feels like your loved one’s work is going nowhere.
Offer to beta read (if you’ve got the time).
If your loved one is looking for beta or alpha readers and the book appeals to you, offering to read it is a HUGE help. Beta readers help writers identify plot holes, awkward sentence structure, story inconsistencies, and whatever else might be wrong with a manuscript before a writer sends their work off for agents to review. It’s a really important job! And because it’s important, it’s probably best if you don’t offer to be a beta reader if you don’t think the book seems interesting or you can’t prioritize it anytime soon. While the writer might not be on a tight deadline, they usually want feedback within a few weeks, maybe months at most. As you’ll see below, there will be plenty of other opportunities for you to support your loved one, so don’t worry if you’re not a good fit as a beta reader.
After They’re Published
Buy their books!
This seems like a really obvious one, but it still needs to be said, especially when there are people out there who think that if they are a friend or family member of the author, they should get access to their work for free. I get it — books are expensive! But the success of a writer’s first book impacts their ability to get another book deal. And while it would be great if a writer could hand out their books like an Oprah giveaway, that’s just not realistic.
Here are some statistics that might shock you. (And also aren’t very exact because of the secretive nature of publishing.)
Most debut books sell between 200 and 300 copies in their first year.
The range that a first-time author can expect to make as far as an advance is $0 - $50,000, with the most realistic range coming in at $0 - $10,000.
So if you think your purchase doesn’t matter, or that you don’t need to support someone because they struck it rich with their book deal, think again.
Attend their events.
Hosting a book event and having no one show up is a grown-up, real-life version of that dream where you go to school without pants on. It can take a long time to build a fan base as an author, so it’s crucial for the ones closest to a writer to show up to their events.
Request their books from the library and in local book stores.
When more libraries carry a book, more people get to read it! Did you know that you can request that your library purchase a book? This can typically be done online (see this example from my local library branch), but you can also ask in person. And the same goes for your local book stores! Stop in or email to let them know they should carry your loved one’s book.
Share their posts.
Social media is a great, free way to market a book. So if you see your friend or family member sharing some big news, event details, or giveaways, make sure to share on your profiles and stories.
Drop their books in free little libraries, doctors’ offices, and give their books as gifts.
If you’re in the position to purchase multiple copies of your friend’s book, there are some GREAT ways for you to share it with your community. Drop a copy into some free little libraries for locals to grab, or bring some to your doctor's or dentist’s office for people to browse while they wait. You can also buy copies to give as birthday or Christmas gifts. Ask your loved one to sign the copies to make them even more special.
Write reviews.
Reviews have a huge impact on whether or not people will read a book. Whether you’re leaving a rating on GoodReads or individual booksellers’ websites, your loved one will be forever grateful that you encouraged others to pick the book up.
Recommend their books in person.
Recommend them to your book club (better yet, choose the book as your book club pick and ask your loved one to come to the meeting), your mom group, your neighborhood group, your kid’s school… tell literally EVERYONE about the book to drum up some interest. Word of mouth is powerful and, again, free!
Ask about their other projects.
As with any creative project, it’s easy to get excited when a book comes out and then forget about it a few months later. But if your loved one is hoping to build a career in writing, chances are that once their book comes out, they will have a new project to focus on. Show interest in what they have coming down the pipeline, and start back at the beginning of this list for each new release. Let them know that you’re in it for the long haul with them. You never know, you may even end up in the acknowledgements someday!
Writers, have anything to add? Put it in the comments!
Hi Jess,
I hope I’m not too late to the party. Overall, I thought it was a very good article. I used to think writing was a more subjective form than say painting, because a painting you can see if it’s good or not (I know that is a subjective opinion) and that writing, you have to slowly put the picture together in a readers mind so it wasn’t as readily apparent as a painting. I’d like to add some of my own thoughts on the process.
The writer should be their own harshest critic. A writer knows what is good and what is bad by what they’ve read in their lives. So, when they’re going through their manuscript should be ruthless, not afraid to kill their darlings (as William S. Burroughs put it), if they find the writing lacking shouldn’t be afraid to take another crack at it. When I started my first novel I followed James Joyce’s habit of rewriting paragraphs, first as an affectation, but then I discovered I could make them better! If you see a hole in the plot don’t be afraid to fill it even if it’s something you hadn’t planned. If you want to read a writer that knows how to fill out those holes and make the most of them Stephen King is your man.
If you’ve self-published don’t be afraid to approach local bookstores. This summer I’ve been pounding the pavement (as the old saying goes) and pitching my book The Lion Communique to local Barnes & Nobles, and they’ve been very receptive. Go into the store, introduce yourself as a local writer and ask about a signing. I haven’t had any of them tell me to get lost, they’re always glad to talk with me and give me the info of the person who does the actual booking. So far, I’ve had 4 signings, 3 more that are upcoming, I possible and 2 I’m going to follow up with later this week. I’ve also booked 2 book readings with Chicago area groups. If after sending a query email and you don’t hear from them FOLLOW-UP!
If you do want to go to a traditional publisher (sorry, I don’t like neologisms or abbreviations) be sure it’s THE BEST you can do. If you have a shred of doubt, go back to the drawing board or self-publish and get reviews that may help for the next time.
Beta-Readers. I only ask people I trust, friends or even acquaintances who have shown interest in my work, but I know they have an acute critical sense. I don’t trust just anybody, but those whose opinions I respect I’ll take seriously. I’ll never post on social media for a beta reader, god knows who you may get and what their motivation may be.
That seems like I went a little long, but I hope your readers find helpful.
Jim Cherry
Great article. I finally threw in the towel of being published traditionally a year ago and have nothing but awe for those with the magic sparkle that can land them an agent or a deal. I’m going down the self publishing route.
I have a children’s illustrated book which will be published by Troubadour in October (Lavender Pots), I have the first of a series of love/romance based memoirs (Crushing Nettles) ready to go, but cannot publish the first until my mother fades away. I am writing its sequel now (Shiksa), book three (Bitter Cinderella) is already in first draft. So most days, 365 I write and along the line try to carve out time to do my little bloglet posts as well as run the business which allows me some time to write.
What I need from my loved ones is nothing more than endless patience. The wife of a musician composer recently told me that there were three people in her marriage, its the same for writers- there is this huge imperative to write that sucks up time and keeps you from being in the moment with your loved ones. Accommodating that, not being jealous of time spent on the third person in the marriage is beyond priceless to me.